what do you do?

what do you do when you terribly do miss someone or something? ;-)
what do you do when all forms of justification ceases to make sense?
what do you do when everything fails to satisfy such deep longing...
such deep longing and yearning which are larger than life, beyond yourself?

i often hear a dear old friend and good ate
who openly expresses her lingering sense of unhappiness
her yearning for that something bigger than herself
her longing for something she can never understand

where would these things come from?
why would He allow this constant visitation?
who would dare confront its reality?
how would one care to hope and cope?

hard questions
costly errors
harsh realities
deep scars

if only these would remain a clear reminder
if only these would keep yelling my humanity
if only these would lead me to a deep acceptance
if only these would tell me who i really am

then, so be it
let it be that
my only life
be an offering

an offering in the making
a sacrifice in the offing
have Your way in me
be in unto me...

according to Your word
according to Your standard
according to Your holiness
according to Your justice
according to Your love

i am secure
i am alright
as it is well
with my sould
indeed!

yearning, as a constant reminder
of ultimate surrender
of utter dependence
there is no other way

longing, in deep remembrance
of the many weaknesses
of the countless failures
this is simply humanity

acceptance
my humanity
all those mistakes
all those scars

deep in my heart
cut along my face
hidden in my soul
lingering, deeply etched

forever

hush
my soul
hush
my heart

pour out
peace
relinguish
love

all graces
all wisdom
all joys
all hope

be still
listen
in His presence
linger

wait...
keep watch
be silent
He is near

to others
portions are given
well-cut
paths well-trodden

yet, for some
cups are full
with sorrow
gifts withheld

to others are given
to some are taken away
only so that in all its beauty
all bests are known

for your sake
for my sake
for His name's sake
for His own glory