undercover

I am an undercover. I live with two identities which can never be put together. It is either-or, a great divide.

I am an undercover. I live with two identities because of a necessity. Because of a burden never my own. Because of a call bigger than myself.

At one moment I am a student of the Bible. But a few seconds later on, I am called to shift to being a student of the Qur’an.

I am a student. I study with my whole heart and being. But only one changes me deeply. There is only one needed direction and being. There is only one.

It is He who said that He is the way, the truth and the life. No more and no less. But, more of Him and less of me.

My friends are terrified and worried that I might still be seeking the way. I assured them that the One who has called me to the way, the truth and the life is the same One who is calling me to sit and understand the path of the Qur’an, not to seek the truth from, not to find the way from, not to look for life and its meaning from. But only to get a glimpse of the other side of the picture.

The fear of losing myself and my heart in the process is a reality and a challenge. Then, only by an extreme favor can I survive. Only by the favor of the One who has brought me this far. Only by the mercy of the One who set this path for me.

The choice is simple. Obey and be faithful. Or run away and get lost.

(Friday, after an IS 141 inspiring discussion again)